I find it interesting that in this society a female is blamed for being in a domestic violence situation. The question is not typically put onto men. It is never about how he could do something like that, it is about what she did to drive him to the point of violence. The question is phrased to blame the female.
Rihanna is a well-known pop star that went through a very public domestic violence situation, shortly after her music changed from bubblegum-pop to racy and sexy lyrics. The lyrics started to carry a darker tone. After being left black and blue by her boyfriend, people started to turn her domestic violence into a joke, saying it was rough sex that went wrong, saying it probably turned her on, saying she wanted it.
This country has a problem with blaming victims. Tina Turner kept going back to Ike, so she was asking for it. Google+ comments about her new single say things like “I think she might be one of those girls…a couple of her songs are about S&M and ruff (sic) sex” or “honestly, with her past few albums, She deserves it.” Even a woman that works in a woman’s shelter with abused women left a comment saying “She did interviews admitting her celebrity and influence…it’s a dumb choice, and I am an asshole for it but I can’t help but [hope] it happens to her again.”
Shouldn’t we all be hoping for the idea of people being able to change? I am not saying that what Chris Brown did was a good thing. I am not supporting him. I do not think he should ever be forgiven and I wish his entire career had been ruined. Unfortunately, it wasn’t and Rihanna has found it in her heart to forgive him. So shouldn’t someone that works with women in similar situations hope that Chris Brown has changed, learned, grown? Maybe instead of hoping it happens again, it would do more good to hope it never happens again.
I do not think Rihanna’s music is a sign that she “wanted” it or liked it. That is the same logic applied to men who rape their wives. How can it be rape if they are married? Last time I checked, no still means no. If a woman tells a man to stop, he should stop. Chris Brown did not stop. He continued to hit her. That is not her fault.
The idea that a few lyrics would put the blame on a victim is saying this is a seriously messed up society.
Shouldn’t we all be hoping for the idea of people being able to change? I am not saying that what Chris Brown did was a good thing. I am not supporting him. I do not think he should ever be forgiven and I wish his entire career had been ruined. Unfortunately, it wasn’t and Rihanna has found it in her heart to forgive him. So shouldn’t someone that works with women in similar situations hope that Chris Brown has changed, learned, grown? Maybe instead of hoping it happens again, it would do more good to hope it never happens again.
I do not think Rihanna’s music is a sign that she “wanted” it or liked it. That is the same logic applied to men who rape their wives. How can it be rape if they are married? Last time I checked, no still means no. If a woman tells a man to stop, he should stop. Chris Brown did not stop. He continued to hit her. That is not her fault.
The idea that a few lyrics would put the blame on a victim is saying this is a seriously messed up society.
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