I recently read a Huff Post article about banning weddings
and baby showers. Honestly, I totally agreed with the article. The author made
plenty of great points and my friend who posted the article received some
backlash in the comments. So, fine banning weddings is a pipe dream, but can we
please all agree that every wedding should have an open bar and allow the
guests a plus one?
I know that some people get married extremely young and can’t
drink at their wedding, but I have to say that is their damn fault. God forbid
I get married, you better believe I am getting toasty on Champagne. I know some people have addiction issues, but
that isn’t my damn fault. I shouldn’t have to celebrate your happiness sober
simply because you cannot handle your vices. Some people are on a tight budget
I get it, but your open bar doesn’t have to be a full bar. Buy some bottles of
wine and a keg or two, call it a day. At the very least, put a flask at every
seat and make sure that flask is filled with booze. Like I said, I shouldn’t
have to celebrate your happiness while sober.
The plus one issue is a little harder. I have plenty of
friends who don’t allow plus ones unless the couple is in a long term serious
relationship. Friends of mine have not given out plus ones to people who knew
most of the guest list and also weren’t in a serious relationship because it is
not like this person would really be alone (the bride and groom shared plenty
of friends with this guest). People I know have picked which friends get to
bring their significant other and which don’t based on the bride and groom’s
feelings about that possible plus one.
I understand that weddings are expensive. I get it. But once
again, your guests are being asked to celebrate your happiness and I don’t
think they should have to be miserable for you to be happy. I know having
wedding guests is expensive with food costs and rental fees for plates, chairs,
tables, napkins, silverware, etc. I get it. However, your guests are probably
spending a pretty penny on your wedding and I don’t think that should go
unnoticed. Planning on sending a thank you card for the gift of ugly wine
glasses you picked out is not the same as acknowledging them showing up just
for you. Let them bring a date, because not everyone is guaranteed to go home
with a bridesmaid or groomsmen or lonely, desperate guest. So, you might be dropping
$100 per plate per person, but your guests are probably buying a new dress or
suit and tie. They are buying you a gift. If your wedding is out of the area
they are paying for travel and hotel. The least you could do is let them bring
a guest.
Weddings have a guest list, I get that. Maybe you don’t want
your wedding to exceed 100 people. But, then you have to figure that probably
25-50 of those people will want to bring a guest. Plus, if you want to have 100
people, be prepared to have more people show up. It is a party, after all. We
all know what happened when our parents were out of town in high school and we
told a few friends to come over. Next thing we know half the graduating class
is there and the cops are being called. Having the cops called on your wedding
is the sign of a true success.
In the true socialist fashion that my bleeding liberal heart
believes in (/sarcasm), all I am saying is, if you are going to consummate your
marriage you should allow your guests to do all but guarantee getting laid by
letting them bring a guest and making sure there is an open bar. If you have to
put Rohypnol in the guest bag, so be it. All I am saying is, this is a happy
day for you, let it also be a happy day for your guests.
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