I am tired of parents saying that if people do not have kids they are not allowed to judge. What a fucking cop out.
Remember being a kid and saying that you would never treat your kids the way your parents treated you? I think that went a little too far. There is a serious generational gap in the behavior of baby boomers and the current generation of children. Sure, there are a lot of differences in everyday life, like technology, but the differences in behavior really astound me.
My parents are Baby Boomers. They are part of the generation that experimented with acid and protested Vietnam, and went to college to avoid the draft. Their generation was historic and great. Their generation watched and participated as the world changed. They saw men walk on the moon, they saw Kennedy change history, they saw MLK move millions of people, they experienced Woodstock, they knew of Reagan the actor. My parents were part of changing the world.
The Baby Boomers were great. They were idealistic and empowered and active. They had energy and education. It didn’t hurt that the generation before them (their parents) had lived through the depression. My grandparent’s generation did a lot of groundwork for my parents. My grandparents made sure their children would be able to receive an education, if not afforded by them, afforded by the government, afforded through student loans at reasonable rates and through scholarships. They encouraged and empowered the Baby Boomers. People growing up and living through the depression knew how important government is, they knew how important voting is, they knew what it meant to be too complacent with the status quo and they passed that energy to my parents.
However, most people of my parents’ generation did not pass that same energy and mentality onto us. Maybe it is because they saw their protest do little to stop a foreign war. Maybe it is because burning their bras did little to further women’s place in society. Maybe it is because no matter how many people showed up to hear MLK, his message still got lost in the hatred. I do not know. But that idealistic fire got lost somewhere and disgusting complacency has been passed on.
Women fought to be allowed into the work force, and they got their way. And with women ever climbing that corporate ladder and divorce rates soaring and people continuing to breed like it is going out of style, the way children are raised is changing. Kids are not allowed to be kids anymore because colleges are starting to look farther back into a teen’s record in order to assure they are qualified to attend college. Getting a degree in General Studies is getting more and more competitive these days. So, at two months old kids are being put on the waiting list for Pre-School and football camp. And kids are not expected to respect their parents. With both of them being gone at work so often and fighting over custody, it is more about who can buy the child than who is a better parent. At some point it stopped being about the child’s wellbeing and started being about the parent’s bragging rights.
And so it starts. When their three year old is running around the Red Robin screaming at the top of his or her lungs, it is not about what a pain in the ass the kid is being, it is about how strong they are for their age with so much energy and what a great lung capacity they have. Fuck that kid and their parents. You want to know why my parents’ generation was so great? It is because their parents beat the shit out of them. Okay, maybe not literally, but come on!
And heaven forbid anyone say something to the parent of one of these juvenile delinquents. The first question is always “well do you have kids?”, as if that has any bearing on what an asshole their kid is being. Answer “yes” and you are fucked because you raised a child that doesn’t act like a complete prick. Congratufuckinglations. However, answer “no” and you are double fucked because you just don’t understand what is like to raise kids! As if you yourself were raised by a pack of wolves and just happened to assimilate into normal society, or as if you yourself was never a child, or as if you have never been around kids that do not act like selfish douchebags.
Don’t get me wrong, sometimes young kids are just having bad days. I get that. I remember being a child and simply being a little brat and not remembering why. I was just in a mood. I suppose it is similar to me experiencing PMS, but as a four year old. However, I also remember my parents removing me from other people. I also remember my mother threating to beat me in front of God and everyone. Trust me, she meant it. That, my friends, is the key difference.
Now when someone threatens to beat their kids CPS is called. You know what happened when I threatened to call CPS? My mom dared me. I never called. I knew better.
I have a small idea of what it is like to raise children. I have this because, even though I spent a lot of time in daycare, my parents raised me. They instilled the fear of God in me (while managing to not be religious). I knew better than to have sex under their roof, do drugs, drink, party, generally act a fool. I knew there were consequences to my actions. For some reason, kids do not seem to have that same sense of responsibility or self-preservation.
I blame their parents, especially the asshole parents that justify their shitty parenting by saying ‘people without kids would not understand’. I remember being a child. I know what is acceptable. And sure, there are a few things I might do differently, at the end of the day; your kid is a fucking prick because you allow him or her to be, not because the rest of us don’t understand the difficulties.
Maybe, when your kid is acting out, think of how your grandparents or great-grandparents might handle the situation. Try to mimic that. If all else fails, I promise not to call CPS if you spank your kid for acting like a little shit.
You’re welcome.
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