Adventures in car buying pt 1

Today I cleaned out my car for what is possibly the last time ever. I expected to feel nothing, or if anything excitement, nervousness, maybe a little bit of anticipation. Instead, I became very emotional. Maybe it was the coffee mug or two full of wine, but I would like to think it is because that car holds so many memories for me.

My father one day told me we were going to go look at cars. He didn’t tell me to bring my checkbook, but I had an idea of what might happen. So, I grabbed my checkbook and followed him out the door. We drove about an hour to the car dealer he had picked out with the selection of new cars he thought would be good for me. I was 17 at the time, a few weeks shy of turning 18. The dealership had a decent selection of Focuses. Some were that ugly hatchback, some were sporty, some were manual transmission. But one had nearly everything I was looking for. A four door sedan with an automatic transmission, the only downfall being the color, “Inferred”. I hate red cars, sick. But, I couldn’t turn my back on a brand new car just because of the color.

So, I got out my father and I got out our checkbooks and left the dealer with a brand new car.

The law in Washington State says a new driver cannot have passengers (other than family) in the car for either six months, or until the driver turns 18, whichever comes first. I was about two week shy of being 18 when my parents and I purchased my car. Of course, my parents told me to wait to give rides to my friends and of course I did not listen. Immediately I was giving two girls that lived down the road (MD and EE) rides to school. EE was always super annoying because she was NEVER ready on time and she was always having some type of earth shattering, life ending drama with her much much older boyfriend. MD was usually funny and quiet and always down to skip first period for some Shari’s.

(For the sake a funny tidbit MD’s dad thought I was a cheerleader because I was a wearing a white pleated miniskirt when I needed him to change the tire on my car because a boulder jumped in front of me on the road)

Soon, I turned 18 and I was driving with passengers legally, shortly after EE stopped getting rides from me. I don’t remember why, but I was none too upset about it. Also soon, I was parking in the high school parking lot without a permit. I knew Coach Nick (our school coach, security guard, etc) was far too super obese (this is a real term and completely fitting) to fit between the cars in order to put a ticket on my front windshield, so I parked along the fence in the parking lot almost every single day. I never got a ticket.

I made plenty of completely stupid driving decisions in the car like racing on the streets and getting into the turn lane to pass my friends, taking turns at 45, doing 100+mph on the freeway, and other general young and reckless ideas. But, by the time I turned 21/22 I had calmed down a lot. For the most part I rarely sped more than with the speed of traffic, I stopped racing my friends, didn’t make stupid risky decisions like taking turns way too fast. Yet, my parents knew I was of legal drinking age and were convinced a DUI was on the horizon.

As of writing this I am DUI free and have every intention of remaining that way.

But as I cleaned out my car today, this flood of memories came back to me. I remember riding with my group of friends with nowhere in my mind, I remember picking up my high school boyfriend (BK) from the airport dressed like a sexy chauffer, I even found a box of his things in the trunk of my car. I saw the glittery heels in my car from long nights dancing and listening to great DJ’s. I found my salsa shoes in my car, reminding me of taking lessons and going out dancing with my Columbian friends. I found about 5 single socks without mates. I found paystubs and old bills, letters I never opened, accident report forms, receipts from a tow company to help me get in my car after one of the many times I locked my keys in my car. I found my permanent protection order that I am supposed to keep on me at all times.

I had make-ups in that car and break-ups in that car. I probably had a first kiss or two in that car. I have some really great memories in that car and some really terrible ones. And while most of those memories will still be with for a long time coming, it is still hard to know as I am cleaning my life out from this vehicle a piece of these memories is getting sold with the car.

It will be nice not to see where my crazy ex (MDW) keyed my car and scratched his initials in the gas cap. It will be nice to not look at the car and remember him sitting in it so I couldn’t leave, until I called the cops, or chased me down in my car on the infamous night to make sure I wasn’t going to tell anyone, to make sure I didn’t have a key to get back in to our place or the garage. I won’t sit in the car and remember how it would smell like booze and cigarettes for days after picking him up from a party.

I won’t have the memory of being sexually assaulted by random guys that I knew who were usually drunk. I would reach across them to open their door and push them out.

But, I also won’t have the memory of going to Jack in the Box instead of fourth period with MD, or making out like high school kids with MC, or talking and laughing for hours about nothing with KAM, or making out in front of MD’s parents with MJ. That Focus is more than just a car; it is an emotional scrap book of my early adulthood. It is a security blanket of memories and life events.

So, while I am excited to get a new car and move closer to real adulthood, it is sad to lose this part of my adolescence. And this is a feeling I did not expect. But, that car has gotten me through a lot. It has put up with its fair share of abuse and I am a little sad to see it leave. I hope it has a better future than just being scrapped for parts.